May 2014 archive

Charleston: One Way

one way

I know there is a functionality purpose for one way streets, but what is it?  When I arrived in Charleston, my gps lady, whose name is Ginger, did not understand the lay out of the city.  I finally started just turning right then left until she figured out how to get me to my summer home. The people in Charleston are friendly and always available to offer directions- which works really well for me. I think that is one reason why this city is the number one vacation destination. After ten hours of driving, I was ready to be out of the car.  Upon arrival, I met my college roommates. (No, I am not starting my doctorate. They are in college.) They are four friendly girls with very different personalities and different goals.

As I started unloading the car and climbing the stairs to my second story bedroom, I realized that I might not really need nine pair of shoes and ten pair of shorts, but thanks to my unbelievable list, I arrived with almost everything I needed. I was a hot sweaty mess after unloading the car.  The temperature and humidity is comparable to the MS temp and humidity, and the air on the second floor was not working well.

The next morning, I decided that I needed a lamp because I had no light in my room, and I needed food. Where is Wal-mart? I found it using my GPS, and it was nice to walk in a Wal-mart and be anonymous. I looked like I had been run over by a truck, but nobody noticed. When you are in your hometown if you walk down the wrong aisle, you may hear that you are the topic of the conversation.
“Oh, did you see her? She looks like she feels really bad.”
“She is letting herself go.”
If this happens to you, just laugh and think about how bored they are.

Wal-mart

After the Wal-mart excursion, I had to work for a little while then I went downtown to eat. If you ever have the opportunity to eat a Crab Cake, Fried Green Tomato, BLT- go for it!

I am learning to navigate with the help of my gps and phone apps.  My gps lady is doing a better job now. I have also downloaded a few apps on my phone to help locate coffee shops.  I do not want to miss anything that is going on in this great city.

Today it was Sullivan’s Island with a friend. It was cloudy, but it was still a very peaceful day at the beach until the rain came. Then we had a great lunch at Morgan Creek Grills at Isle of Palms Marina:  fried oysters, crab dip, and shrimp over grits.Morgan Creek Grill MOrgan Creek Grill-2

Tonight, dinner downtown. I have a guide tonight who knows the best restaurants and how to navigate the downtown area. I am excited!
An interesting website if you want to find out more about Charleston:    http://www.charlestonly.com

I read a book by Dorthea Benton Frank that was titled Sullivan’s Island. I recommend it for your summer reading list. One of my favorite quotes from her: “The most important thing I learned is that to be truly happy, you’ve got to pay attention to that stupid inner voice we all have. It knows what you need and will drive you shit crazy until you listen to it.”
― Dorothea Benton FrankIsle of Palms

Sullivan’s Island – Click here to preview book.

The one way streets are also a metaphor for our lives. There is never one way to do something or one path that will make everyone happy. We all must find our true path and be constantly searching for the path that will allow us to be authentic and enable us to search for the end of the rainbow.

R[oy]GBCreative Commons License jDevaun via Compfight

Plenty of Fish: South Carolina Fishing

Why do we feel the need to go fishing?  Well, since creation we have been wired or programmed to need or want the opposite sex.  Take in to consideration our work ethics and family responsibilities, and you can understand why an online dating site is necessary and could be very helpful in making friends or finding dates. Yes, I think I will do some South Carolina Fishing.

You may conquer with the sword, but you are conquered by a kiss .craig via Compfight

My friend’s daughter moved to a new town and used Plenty of Fish to meet people, and there is choice of “not seeking a relationship or any kind of commitment”; I was intrigued. I also have a friend who loves this site and has a lot of fun talking to different people.  I will say of other dating sites I have researched and the different people I have talked to about online dating, this is hands down the best. It is simple and like texting a friend. Did I mention that it is FREE?

Of course, caution is always needed. Meet in a public place with your own transportation.  To establish my validity or lack of validity, this advice is coming from someone who at this time has never been on a meeting or date from an online meeting/dating site.  I have heard several success stories, but I have also heard several awkward meeting stories. I wanted to contact the examples below and offer my help with their profiles.

Notes to the male participants:

  1. No pictures of fish or any other dead animal. We do not care how big your fish was on your last fishing trip. Blood of any kind is a no-no!  We may be concerned about the size of other things like your truck but not your latest catch or kill!
  2. Chip on the shoulder immediately seen when a rant occurs in the interests and hobbies. I really hate that women have blocked you, but do not take it personally. You are not their type. Be thankful that the women did not lead you on and waste your time.
  3. Honesty -for example, if you do not like children do not reply – I like that. Time is not something that should be wasted.
  4. This is important or you would not have signed up. Take the time to let someone make a good picture of you.
  5. Fudge on the interest a little: You are a very attractive man, but most women do not like cars or racing. Insert one item that most women like to do: going to the beach, going to the mountains, etc.
  6.   Do not put a picture up where you still have your wedding ring on your finger. Use the cropping tool, darling.
  7. Proofreading needed: When you do not capitalize “I” or use periods, it is a turn off for educated women. If you want an educated woman, write a post that shows you graduated from elementary school.
  8.  Do not write too little or too much. A couple of paragraphs should get your message across. Who wants to read an essay? Save something to talk about at your first meeting.
  9.  Try not to give your reader this message: “I am looking for sex or lots of one night stands”, but also do not sound like,” I want a house keeper and available sex without putting forth a great deal of effort, and by the way, I am looking for marriage”.
  10. If you must attract a women with your success story or your expensive sports car, do you really want her?  You can mention that you are a successful ambitious person, but who needs a gold digger?

Notes to the females: Read the list above. All except #1 also applies to us.

  1. A great picture is all you need for most guys. Seriously, this is all you need. Men are visual creatures.
  2. Do not scare him away with talks of meeting the love of your life and discussing the children you want to have. This would make many men run even if it is what they are also searching for at this time.
  3. Your dream man will probably not want to go shopping or get a manicure. Expand your interest to include something you can do together.
  4.  Many are already bogged down with responsibility. Do not make him feel like he will be responsible for you. One of our needs is security, but the last thing he wants to hear may be that you want to be taken care of financially.

Read this link:  13 Things Men Think About Women But Never Say

Be honest my friends, but choose your words carefully. This truthism could be applied to our lives in everything we do.  Stay tuned for updates on Fishing in South Carolina!

GPS needed for U Turn Queen

What address do I put in? Yes, this girl needs a gps. I am directionally challenged individual; hence, I am the U turn queen of the road. A trip does not feel complete without a few U turns. Changing directions is not always a bad thing, but it can seem like it at the time.

Yes, all of this was in my office.

Yes, all of this was in my office.

As I moved my office home last week, I was astounded at all of the stuff I had in that tiny space. After I hauled it home, I put the classic books away, but many things still remain in boxes. I am sure most will be thrown away later, but I cannot do it right now. It is like discarding old pictures or old messages- it takes a little while to wrap your head and heart around it.
I slipped out of the office because I did not want hugs or tearful good byes. You spend more time with the people you work with than you do your family. They are your work family that you love and you become a silent member of their family as you hear them talk about the loves in their life on a daily basis. It is a place to escape your personal life and emerge in a professional goal oriented world.
I was one of the lucky ones to leave a job that I loved (except for the endless stacks of essays to grade) and people that I love not because I have to leave, but because I want to try a different path. Will this be the path for me, well, who knows but I had to see.

I am ready to embrace a new city, meet people, and learn more about me. I think self-reliance is a valuable teacher- (Emerson would be loving me right now.)
Finding the perfect room to rent sealed the deal for my choice of cites, and of course, the beautiful beaches and the many things to do in the city did not hurt the vote for Charleston.
How did I get here? If someone told me last summer this would be where I am right now, I would have been a little frightened, but we have strength within us that allows us to roll with the flow and chase our dreams or maybe allow us to get answers to our questions. Most of the time we keep that strength bottled because change is hard.
Ready or not Charleston, this Mississippi girl will soon be on her way! I am preparing now because besides being the U Turn Queen, I am the Queen of Planning. I have so many wonderful titles! One of the first things was the packing list, and this one is intense, but I have only my car, so I am keeping it as light as possible. Some things may get left behind, but my beach chair will be in the car.

Other necessities will be insurance cards and proper identification and of course, my passport. If someone walks up to me on the street and gives me a free trip to Bali, I want to be ready to leave!
Financial things must also be considered. I do not want to return to MS and find I have no power, no water, or Lord forbid, no internet! There is only so much you can do and then you must quiet your control tendencies and take off.
Stay tuned for more as the Queen of U Turns and the Queen of Obsessive Planning will soon land!
buisness cards 003Thank you Lori– the Queen of Creative Ideas.

Destin: The Freedom of the Ocean

Destin is my second home and the ideal destination for a quick getaway. There are many different things you can do and thousands of places to stay, but this is my ideal trip, and it can be an economical destination. Gazing at the ocean gives you a wonderful feeling of freedom.Destin 2014 029

The boardwalk has great restaurants and activities for the entire family. I have found a hotel across from the Destin Board Walk  in Destin that meets my needs and saves money. Three nights at the Village Inn in Destin  and the cost was $297.00 and when you split that three ways, you have a cheap weekend getaway.  Waffle House is in the parking lot for late nights and early mornings.
This is the only disadvantage of our location. You must drive to the beach. The two public beaches I enjoy are Fort Walton Board Walk and the public beach by Pompano Joe’s in Destin.

The gorgeous view as we ate lunch.

The gorgeous view as we ate lunch.

 

Our days at the beach were amazing days!  The water was beautiful, no seaweed and the temperature was perfect.  Sunscreen was sprayed very liberally because the umbrella would not work for us. (I need to invest in one of those gadgets that digs holes for the umbrella.)

My favorite eating place is Dewey Destin.  The food is always good and the waiting area is comfortable.   AJ’s is the night time destination for me because there is always a good band and the view of the harbor is beautiful.

Sunday Funday at AJ's

Sunday Funday at AJ’s

On the way home, we stopped at a delightful new restaurant called Boudreaux’s Cajun Grill in Daphne, AL. The food was good, and I had the best drink I have ever had. It was called Southern Belle.

Look at the ingredients in the Southern Belle.

Look at the ingredients in the Southern Belle.

 

This was my yes, I am starting a new chapter in my life trip to celebrate and to spend time with friends before my big departure next week. The best place for me to focus on my life and gain insight is while I am looking out at the immense ocean and feeling as one with the creator.  The ocean provides this feeling for many people. My tension in my shoulders started to loosen up, and I felt a sense of peace and well-being as the stress and the tears of the last three months melted away.

My moments of clarity lead me to this truth for me:
Do not give yourself away until there is nothing left of you but a hull of a person. Giving can be applied to your job, your family, and all relationships. After you reach the empty stage and everyone around you is happy but you, what do you have? A lost and bewildered individual constantly looking for fulfillment and approval. “You are enough.” Maya Angelo. You do not need another person to complete you.    Complement someone’s life but do not be his/her life and someone should not be your life. There will be disappointment if you make another person your world.  I know what you might be thinking. How can   my children not be my life or my spouse of twenty years not be my life?  They can be the great loves of your life, but they should not be your entire world. That is too much responsibility for them to carry. We are responsible for our own happiness.

Questions to ponder:
Who is loving you? Do you still take time for you? Do you make people happy and accommodate them to keep peace and to avoid conflict while your resentment and anger grows? Do you set boundaries of how much you are willing to give? When have you been asked what you want or need to be happy?
“There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth: not going all the way, and not starting.”  The Lost Girls, page 346.


 

Oh, the t-shirts you can buy in Destin!

Oh, the t-shirts you can buy in Destin!

 

 

Great memories made!

Great memories made!

Destin 2014 015

Packing List: Say “Yes” to all Trips

 RaCreative Commons License Chris Marchant via Compfight

Do not allow the stress of packing to put a damper on any trip. If you are invited on a last minute get away, do not hesitate before you say “Yes, I would love to accompany you on this trip”. I love to travel because it allows me to meet new people and see different things; therefore, packing is important to me. Being an obsessive list maker, before every trip I would make out a detailed list then I finally found the magic list that worked.  What works for one person will not work for everyone because of job requirements or different recreational activities that everyone chooses to participate in while on vacation, but maybe this will give you a start to your perfect packing list. I have come a long way as my friends would agree. This amazing transformation occurred because of my recent trips this past year to Denver. With the price of a plane ticket, I did not want to pay an extra $50.00 for “more stuff” to travel with me.   The amount of liquids that are allowed and the number of shoes I could bring with me was the hardest part for me to reconcile. This list worked for me after making a few hard decisions about products and what shoes to bring.   This is a four day trip suggestive list

(Thursday to Sunday).

Detailed Clothing:

Choose a color palette. This will help you decide on shoes and jackets, cardigans, etc. For example, if black shoes can be worn with every outfit you are taking then you can choose one/two pair of black shoes and this eliminate excess baggage and makes choosing outfits so much easier.

Are you driving or flying to your destination? What is the weather forecast for your area of travel? Is this a beach trip, a trip to the mountains?

Thursday- travel/ dinner outfit
This works for me:  Jeans- with spandex. This allows you to look good and not look wrinkled and sloppy when you arrive. Change shirts, add jewelry or scarf and you are ready for dinner. These jeans can also be worn again.

Friday  _______________________________

Friday night________________________________

Saturday_________________________________

Saturday night_________________________________

Sunday- travel____________________________

Underwear– Consider your color of clothing.
Bras- Consider your activities and what clothing you are choosing. Strapless dress- strapless bra if needed should be added. Do you plan to work out or are you participating in a 5K? Add sports bras to your list.

Socks – Do you need dress socks, no socks, or athletic socks?

Jewelry/ Scarves- Choose jewelry and scarves that will work with several outfits.

Pajamas – Is this a girl’s trip, business trip, fishing tournament or a romantic getaway?

Shoes – What shoes do you have that will work with all of your outfits? Do you need athletic shoes?

One quart bag – no more three ounces:

The hotel will supply lotion and shampoo and soap. I know this is a hard sacrifice, but it is a necessary sacrifice.

My list for the small quart bag:
Contact solution
Liquid make up
Toothpaste
Mascara
Concealer
Moisturizer
Face wash
Vaseline

**Remember anything liquid in your purse/pockets must be also stuffed in the quart size bag.

I have found that using contact cases for liquids helps me to stay in the limit. These work for makeup, liquid meds, and face wash, etc.

Other essentials:
Blush
Eyeliner
Lipstick
Razor

Brush
Curling iron/straightener

Tech requirements for me:
Cell phone charger
Lap top/headphones
Camera

If you are traveling with a group, coordinate your packing list. If they are bringing toothpaste then you do not need to bring toothpaste. You can share and save packing space.

Share your travel destinations with us.  I am packing to visit my second home Destin, Florida, this weekend which will be a driving destination. I am excited about bringing my shampoo and hair spray – no quart bag limit!  I hope the city is qready for the new chapter celebration!
I will add to my packing list:
Beach chairs
Umbrella
Sunscreen
Bathing suit
Beach towel
Small cooler
Books

Everyone is different and requires different things for a successful trip, but I hope this helps.   What are your travel plans for the summer?  Share your travel destinations with us and your packing tips.

Suggestions for weekend road trip

http://southmeetswest.com/

 

NashVegas

Nash Vegas

Nashvegas

Our first destination was Maggianino’s.   It was a very nice Italian restaurant, but honestly the hour and a half wait was not worth it, but they have an amazing deal where when you buy certain things, you are given a dish to take home with you from the same area on the menu. This would be a very lucrative incentive if you are living on a budget.    I could not have endured the wait without the comical entertaining company.  Thank you, my favorite lawyer, for our great meal and the entertainment!  Nashvegas 007

  After this fun time, we went downtown to the exhilarating flashing lights of Broadway. We had a great time, but the highlight was the band at The Stage and the guy on the street playing the drums and making up songs about the crowd.

drummer on street in NashvilleNashvegas 023When it was time to return to the apartment, I was introduced to a new wonderful way of travel. Lyft is a great organization in Nashville that is easy, cost effective and safe.  You sign up, give them your debit/credit card information. Call when you need a “Lyft” home and a driver with a big pink mustache on the front of the vehicle is sent to pick you up. A picture of the vehicle and the driver is sent to you by text and the estimated time of arrival. After the ride, you tip the driver and rate the ride home. The driver also rates the passenger. This way if the driver and the passenger was not a match, the next time a different driver will be sent to pick you up. It is a win-win situation.    This is available in other cities, and the driver told us that it will soon be available in Jackson, MS.    Nashville | Lyft on-demand ridesharing Nashvegas 024

The next morning consisted of brunch at Jackson’s Bar and Bistro. The Sunrise Sliders were cooked to perfection and then the stroll through the Hillsboro Village Neighborhood was relaxing. The next taste bud treat was an amazing hazelnut white mocha at The Frothy Monkey coffee shop downtown.  It revitalizes your sense of adventure to get away from your normal routine even if it is for the night.  Nashvegas is a great destination for a weekend away. Thank you, Lauren, for your hospitality and for the tour of your beloved city!

Nashvegas 040

 

Destination

Cecret Lake - Alta Utah Al_HikesAZ via CompfightDestination Unknown
Why is change so hard for human beings? This has been a very emotional two weeks filled with a few teary breakdowns and some unexpected emotions. Even knowing that I have a wonderful opportunity to explore different things and to expand my very small horizons does not keep these feelings at bay. I have ever reason to be over the top ecstatic, but my life will change, and that makes me uncomfortable.
This type “A” chick does not do well without concrete plans in front of her. I need a destination. You know I am the planner in my purse, planner on my desk at home, and planner on my desk at my office kind of girl. Yes, I still write everything down. I have not graduated to the planner on my iPhone, but I will get there. The qualities that make you a great employee sometimes make you struggle with the real world that begins when you leave your work place. Relaxing and rolling with the flow of life is not an easy task for me. I am more comfortable with myself when I am busy. I also use work to avoid dealing with “stuff”. If you are busy, you do not have time to think about or sort out your baggage, and we all have baggage. To find my balance which has been way off, I need to finalize a plan.
Where or where do I land for the summer? My night riding four wheeler friend gave me great advice. He said, “Sometimes the destination may not be what you want when you get there, but the journey itself will restore you.” But where, oh where, do I go?
Finding a place to sublet was harder than I thought it would be. Craigslist automatically comes up on my computer as soon as I put in a “C”. I think they should be paying me for the time spent on each site.
Destinations considered for my summer excursion:
• Cheyenne, WY
The Outlaw Saloon does call my name frequently, and it did seem like a good idea for a long time.
• Salt Lake City, UT
Everything closes at midnight which is the same as it is here in Mississippi. I do have a friend there to be my sightseeing partner, but my favorite sublet was not available.
• Portland, Oregon
According to my friend Colleen (my wonderful blog developer), Portland is blog haven and her friend Tea Silvestre Godfrey, a marketing genius, also lives there! I want to meet her for coffee and attend the Summer Soiree 2014 and explore Portland.
http://storybistro.com/story-bistros-first-annual-summer-soiree-july-19-20-2014-portland/
• Hawaii
I joined a housesitting website which lead me to consider Hawaii. I should have investigated the website a little more. (I have figured out recently that my investigation skills need major work.) Most housesitting jobs are not for the US, and you are not paid for these glorious jobs, and you must pay your own airfare. . I would pay my airfare for Hawaii with a big smile on my face, but as you can imagine many people wanted that housesitting job.
http://www.trustedhousesitters.com/us/
There are also demands that must be met from each house owner, and there are some unique expectations from the sitters. Even with my limited budget and love of new places and new people, I am not milking a goat.
• Greece
I wanted this housesitting job also. It was like a dream, but someone grabbed that dream before my e-mail was received by the owner.
• Portland, Maine
I want to walk down the cobbled streets and look at everything this city has to offer.
• Central America
I started reading a book that my thoughtful loving supportive daughters bought me as a reinvention happy. It is about three young women who travel the world for a year focusing on Central America.It is a great book that deals with each girls inner struggle to continue the journey and leave familiar behind. I  became excited even though I would be traveling alone. I contacted a European Destination website. I told the nice lady on the phone that I wanted to travel in Central America for a month. She sent me a quote, and that my dears, was the end of that dream.. $6,000.00.

• Scarborough, Maine
No words needed when you look at this picture.Portland Head Light in Snow Brent Danley via Compfight

• Belize
A retiree/reinventors dream awaits me in Belize. The cost of living is affordable and there is always something to do or something beautiful to see.

• Charleston, SC
This city has everything I want. After reading several books about Sullivan Island and Folly Beach then mix in the culture, history, and magic of the city, this city is moving up in the list.
For someone who reads the menu twice and then debates about what to order, deciding where you want to run away to has been a hard task for me, but a door will open. Doesn’t it always? If you open yourself up to what this wonderful world has to offer and allow yourself to be vulnerable, life begins to happen.
Where, oh where, should I go? That door will open soon.

Check out Liz’s blog. She is an amazing independent lady.
http://youngadventuress.com/2013/09/solo-female-travel.html

Reinvention

Rocking chair on the deck - Antigua, Mar 2010

What do I want to be when I grow up?

Reinvention is now the new word for “Retirement”, or it should be.

One definition of retirement means leaving one’s job and ceasing to work and another definition is seclusion. Who does that when they change jobs or change their life journey?  The connotations of retirement are typically negative and negative thoughts lead to negative remarks and negative behavior toward yourself and toward others. You see the pattern here.
I am 49 (which is the new 39 or so I am hoping for the energy level and with Botox and Retina A), and I am reinventing myself after 28 years as an educator. I will work in some form or fashion, and I will be as far to the other side of the spectrum of seclusion as you can possible be, so no, I am not retiring.

I am in the land of new chapters and new beginnings.

Reinvention is when you decide you want to do something different and that could be any change in your life. You could change jobs, change your habits, change your underwear style, etc.. I know prefer low boy cuts to thongs. Would that be considered reinvention? Well, it could. I do not know all that I want to do, but I plan for parts of it to be a “wild ride” and parts of it to be just peace and contentment.

Dragoncon 2010 Anna Fischer via Compfight

West is my destination for the summer hence the title of my blog. My first trip west, not including Vegas, was last July to Cheyenne, WY, for Frontier Week (more about that later); this trip sparked my interest in several different ways, so to validate my title, as my budget will allow, I must spend some time  soaking up the sites and people of the west. I did realize that if you turned a certain way that anywhere can be west. (I am directionally challenged.) This convinced me to start researching different cities.  I thought about house sitting which I may revisit at a later date. Of course, there were many of us who wanted the house sitting job in Hawaii!  This convinced me to start researching different cities and thinking about where and what I wanted from a location.

What do you take in to consideration when you are looking for some where to live?

Walk or drive

Do you want to be in a large city with public transportation and with restaurant, bars, and coffee shops close to you?

Do you want to drive everywhere as we do in small Southern towns?

I want to be able to do both. I enjoy walking and leaving the car parked. I like that about New York City – no car, no gas.  I also would like to drive around wherever I am to see the state. Having social interaction locations close by is a definite plus to me. I like to eat, have a cold beer or a wonderful strong coffee, and I like to talk a lot!

House or apartment

Due to my budget, this was a no-brainer for me. Apartment with roommates was my only option. It is challenging to explain to a prospective roommate that you are 49 and running away from home for the summer and maybe longer.

What do I hope to gain from this experience?  I want to meet new people, and I want to examine “me”. Our time on this great earth is limited and I want to try and find my passion and my purpose which as most of us know is a lifelong mission. Living complacently is not the way I ever want to live. There are times in your life when your choices are physical limited, but you are never mentally limited. I want to be better tomorrow than I was today. I backslide every other day in to that unaware state, but I keep trying to climb the mountain.

I have not finalized my plans for where this exotic Reinventionist will reside at this point in my journey, but I do hope to share that with you soon.   The south will meet the west!

If you could reinvent yourself in any way what would you do? What are you waiting for?

Read these two links and let me know what you think.

Courage: A Small Dose Will Help With Your Reinvention. Do You Have It?

The Ultimate Cheat Sheet For Reinventing Yourself

50 Shades

Shades of Grey

Why did we love the trilogy of 50 Shades of Grey?My baby girl praline3001 via Compfight

And why are these books still on my mind?

The focus for many of us was not the Dominant Submissive Lifestyle introduced to the reader. The fame and acclaim of the book could not have been achieved if that was the primary focus of the book. E L James carefully intertwined the basic fantasies/needs of most women:

  • Financial Security
  • Emotional Security
  • Wonderful sex

Financial security is one of the primary needs of a woman, and I do not mean that women want only rich men. We need to feel secure in as many aspects of our life as humanly possible. By accepting his love, most choices and decisions for Anna are his to make. Money is no longer a concern which is a major concern in most people’s lives. Do I drive to work or will someone drive me? What will I eat for breakfast? Well, whatever you tell Ms. Jones to cook is what you can have for breakfast. Security through money would allow someone to focus on sex. No grocery shopping, no car repair, no housework, no worries about paying the rent- Yes, we could focus on pleasurable activities if we were not worried about time restraints and how we were going to pay our bills this month.

Emotional security is another primary need, and the love in this book is over the top and almost suffocating, but it is constructed as to say to the reader that he means well and his controlling tendencies are frosted with good intentions. She knows that his love is deep, and that she is the only one and that he will do whatever he needs to do to keep her happy and in his arms. Who does not want that?

Sex in this book is taken to a level that many women never imagined existed.
 How many men have that sex drive? How many women can have an orgasm on command every time? (Of course, we do not have Christian Grey in the bedroom.) The reader is introduced to the BSM lifestyle, sex toys and other sexual aids that most did not know existed. I mean really, my friends, who shops at the hardware store for sexual props. While shopping at Lowe’s or Home Depot, I had never thought about what I could use in the bedroom.

I prefer this online store to the hardware store:

Adam and Eve Adult Store – Shop Erotic Adult Toys and Novelties

It will arrive in a non-marked bag so the mailman or your children do not hyperventilate, and it will not appear on your bank statement as the “sex store purchase”, so go shopping!!

When something stops working, let this company know. Excellent customer service.

While most of us are not powerful bizzillionaires, it is nice to think that one of these types would be interested in a “normal person” who only has her love to give. It deflates the theory of rich attracts rich and proves to the reader that love is more important which provides the middle class girl with hope for an Audi Submissive Special and a new wardrobe chosen by the Neiman Marcus personal shopper.

Does it provide us with a healthy dose of realism? Uh, no! Why would we read it if it did?
For mature women, it was a great read and an escape to a very sexual entertaining place. Many men hope and pray for E L James to continue her career as new things were introduced to the bedroom and the interest in sex at home spiked. How can that be a bad thing? Well, if you think every man you meet is going to be like Christian Grey, or if it makes you expect too much from your partner then it could cause a problem. One woman told me that her husband was very sad that there was not a fourth book.

For younger women, it might prove a little troubling because as we know, someone that is 50 shades must want to help themselves, and most do not have the funds for years of therapy; therefore, you might want to run home to Mother if you are introduced to the Red Room of Pain then again you might want to stay.

James carefully constructed the support system of the family and the staff, but the focus was on Christian and Anastasia. I will admit that I missed them after I finished reading the books for the fourth time.

Interesting Read: 50 Shades of Grey’ Fan Divorcing Husband After He Refuses to Re-Create Scenes From Book (Report)

For my guy blog friends: Dave Barry Learns Everything You Need to Know About Being a Husband From Reading 50 Shades of Grey

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