Archive of ‘Friendship’ category

Be Happy: Spring 2014 Freak Out

Hepburn  -1 How can you forget how blessed you are and not be happy?  Most people have certain freak out times in their lives that they will never forget. I have a few periods of my life that I will never forget, but the most recent freak out was the spring of 2014.

I was retiring from my job in education after twenty-eight years that went by in a flash of light. I was experiencing problems with friends and a boyfriend relationship, and I was going to be a Gigi (a grandmother), and I would be turning 50 in September. Can we say emotional roller-coaster from hell?

My decision to retire was a hard one, but after seeing the financial breakdown, it was the smart thing to do. I loved the people that I spent my day with in the office,  and I enjoyed the administrative parts of my job. I did not enjoy grading one hundred essays a week during certain weeks of the school year. I loved helping other instructors and being the go to girl for online English problems. It was rewarding, and I felt like I was actually making a contribution to the online program at ICC to move in a forward motion.  When I saw on paper how my salary would increase if I stayed four more years, I realized it would not be the right choice for me to stay. I am a breast cancer survivor who does not believe in counting on tomorrow. At this point, my prognosis is good (if I change my life style), but how mad at myself would I be if I worked more years and then realized that my time on this earth was up.  This was one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make.  What would be my new normal?

I am a Virgo control habitual list making freak, so change sometimes throws me for a loop for a little while.  I did have a deep desire to live somewhere else for a while and travel, so that is what I did-hence the Charleston and Costa Rica trips. I still plan to travel a lot and meet new people and see new places. Who knows where I will end up, but I know it will be a fabulous place.  My heart is beating a little faster as I think about the places I am going to go one day.

I had an amazing support system. I cannot say thank you enough to my friends who have stood by me and checked on me where ever I was. The hugs, lunches, daily counseling sessions and pep talks from my friends were my shelter in the storm.  My friends believed in me when I felt emotionally drained.   They said, “Go for it. What is the worst that can happen? If you can handle the worst scenario then you got this.”  I cannot thank my daughters enough who were excited about my adventures and encouraged me ever step of the way. My family was supportive but worried.

A grandmother in September- Wow! My kids are not old enough to have kids! Oh wait, they are 27 and 24. I guess they are old enough.  I think the first shocking thought was “My baby is having a baby”!  To make it even more interesting, it is a boy baby.  I know baby boys pee in your face and love Bob the Builder. Who is Bob the Builder? Is that Barbie’s friend? Am I old enough to be a Gigi- Yes, I am.

I am excited about this new addition to my life that I will love very much.  I have a great rocker thanks to Jane’s grandmother, and many books to read to my grandson. I love to rock and read as we called it when the girls were little.  I can give him candy, and I do not have to pay his dental bills. My daughter and son-in-law will be amazing parents, and the support system they have is unbelievable.

I will be 50 in September. Do I feel 50? No, and those that know me will definitely agree that I do not act my age even though sometimes I guess I should. I do try to preserve my face and exercise – Yes, I have a vain and shallow side. Doesn’t everyone? Thank you Retina A and Botox.

This made my thoughts go in a different direction. What have I done with my time on this great earth? There are so many things that I could have done better, but no dress rehearsal is allowed, and don’t you hate that phrase about hindsight is 20/20?  You get one shot, and it passes by so fast.  What could you do better? I have so many things that I need to work on in my life to make me a better person; I want to be loving and kind to everyone and never cold and judgmental.love is an investmnet

My new normal for now is teaching a couple of online classes and working part-time for a great business; therefore, I am a very busy lady as I wait to be a Gigi. I hope to declutter my house soon, get the little trees out of the flower beds when I have time, and Thursday night starts this Ole Miss girl’s football season. Hotty Toddy!

My feet are on the ground now. I am still finding my way and adjusting to the changes in my life, but my life is good.  I hope your life is good also.how to live- hepburn

Audrey Hepburn was an amazing classy lady. Cheers to her!My Fair Lady Breakfast

Band-Aids to your Heart

photo credit: BWJones via photopin cc

After having a life altering event happen, my friends and my daughter came to the rescue. My gratitude for these people makes my heart swell. My friends invest in me with their heartfelt hugs, kind words, and memories of good times.

My dear Alabama Crimson Tide friend:  She comforts me at work, and she takes me to lunch. She tells me to remember that you are a strong, independent, beautiful, intelligent woman. One person’s dumbass actions has no bearing on who you are as a person.
AL glass
Remember those words:

One person’s dumbass actions has no bearing on who you are as a person.

Then on Saturday night, she hires a town car to pick me up with her in the back waiting on me with a tall glass with a big A and Crimson Tide on the side.  It was filled to the brim with Grey Goose and cran-apple juice – my favorite drink! She made sure my drink was never empty for the entire night, and this Ole Miss girl sucked it down. We then go to her house and her husband cooks the best grilled chicken that I have ever eaten in my life. He will not tell me the rub he concocted, but I will keep asking him and hopefully share it with you later. The hugs and conversation helped me relax and enjoy the night.  Note to my life roommates:  Give someone your phone to keep until the next morning. Even though I did receive a wonderful picture with the cutest jewelry in the center.

bandaid_1My oldest friend shared with me her present that she had received the previous week.

I had this little bird in my possession to point at evil. I even rubbed it like a Genie Lamp a few times, and it would calm me down.

I was filled with her love every time I looked at the little bird.

My daughter hugged me and had my back. Both of my daughters are strong supporters of whatever I do. The great part is that it does not matter what I do.

Their unconditionally love is always a constant in my life.

bandaid_2My dear friend who loves life and is always positive offered support and help when I needed a lifeline, and he offered to help me with a fun filled plan of action.

He is a handsome, strong, protective warrior, and he is kind. (He loves to throw Frisbees at the beach.)

Without all of these strong and loving people, it would have been a tough weekend. I would have survived this situation, but it was so much easier with the love and support of my friends.  Be there for your friends and love them through whatever they may be facing.

What does your friend do for you when he/she knows you are hurting?

Friends Through Thick and Thin

photo credit: honey-bee via photopin cc

Good day to all!

My friends are my lifeline to love, compassion, support and laughter.

I do not know how your friends fit in to your life or what they bring to your table of life, but my friends help me to navigate and enjoy my life.  Our friends meet needs in our life that cannot be met by our lovers or by our families.

Why do I love my friends? I love them because I can call them at any hour of the day, and they will listen to me.  Even the trivial stuff, even the gross stuff… I can discuss the shoe sale at Belk or the jean sale at the GAP, but I can also talk about my sex life or my fears or the gravity force that is pulling on my body. It does not matter what the subject is my good friends listen. Some friends are so close to you that they feel your pain, and they feel your joy.  While they may be thinking, “You are a dumbass.” They still love you and care about your happiness.

My friend who has been by my side since junior high is all about perspective. Our backgrounds and trials in life have been very similar.   She helps me to see my world in a different way.  “Take a step back, Wanda, and rise above the situation; look at this from all perspectives. It will help you to understand their behavior, and it will keep you from reacting in the wrong manner.”  — which I sometimes do especially when my chimp, Bertha the bitch, takes over.

It is also great that when life takes you down different paths, and you do not get to talk to a dear friend for a little while, but you see each other and pick up right where you left off.

Laughter is another wonderful thing that my friends share with me. I have so many wonderful memories of trips and laughter and love shared between my friends. The stress release of laughter and the great feeling of being in a safe place where you can say what you feel allows you to enjoy life and handle the ups and downs of your life.

What is the funniest memory you have with your bff?

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